Children do not always know how to control their emotions. More often than not, they lash out and puts you in a quite awkward spot. Tantrums, defiance, and whining are all a part of these strong overwhelming emotions. Some children do these to do get their way, while others might be a bit sensitive. Normally during these screaming, the brain’s rational part does not communicate with the emotional side, making it harder to handle. Below are some ways on how you can deal with these emotional outbursts of your children.
- Making them understand their emotions
Children surf through a lot of emotions. Parents should make sure that their children can identify the emotions they are going through. So that they could understand that they would lose their control since emotions build over time. Some children equate negative emotions with bad emotions. Thus, they do not want to take into account their anxiety and sadness. By making sure your children can recognize these emotions and name them, you can easily manage them.
- Feelings meter
As a parent, you should always describe the emotions you feel so that your children could also relate to them. Also, it would be best if you made a scale of 1-10 to rank your emotions. Intense emotions like anger and sadness would be higher up the scale. In this way, when a child is flustering, they would take a moment to identify their emotions. Then you can help them with that.
- Validation of feelings
Your child should always feel that you acknowledge their feelings and understand what they are going through. Validation is like acceptance, where you try to comprehend your child’s feeling without trying to change, fix or belittle it. It is a non-judgmental act. You can do this by giving the child your full and undivided attention when talking to you. Also, you need to take into account their body language and expressions. By trying to apprehend their perspective, you can stop your child from bursting out.
Sometimes you need to overlook your child’s bad behavior, which means not giving attention to arguing and whining. By disregarding these emotions and removing your attention, you make sure that this type of behavior is not repeated. You can do this by either leaving the room or turning your face away. But the trick is as soon as they are on good behavior, you should appreciate and praise them and not ignore them.
- Firm expectations
Make sure you follow a consistent routine with your child so that they know what to expect. Give them a specific bedtime and supper time so that when the time comes, they do not whine. Also, give a warning before the transition period. If your child is playing games, tell them 10 minutes earlier than they are expected for dinner. In this way, your child would be prepared and would not create a fuss.
- Praising your child
When you teach your child a new behavior, it is very important to praise them when following it. In this way, they would be encouraged to do it more. Be very specific and enthusiastic with your compliments, and make sure your child knows why they are being praised.
As a parent, you should always keep aside 10 minutes of your day for your children. In that 10 minutes, you will let your children in charge and tell and do things without judging and admonishing. In this way, you are creating a haven for your child, which is important for their mental health.